lose yourself
by Neverdawn
Summary: Hikaru's parents die and now he is in deep depression is there any way to snap him out he has pushed every one away from him or so he thinks. Yaoi and possible suiside DISCONTINUED
1. Chapter 1

Lose yourself

Chapter 1 Cry for help

Disclaimer: I dont own hikaru no go and this is not a song fic so :P and please read and reveiw.

PLEASE NO FLAMES ok .

Warning: yaoi, possible suiside and possible drinking problems.Eeeek no flames. no da

parings: aki/hika and slight way/isu. on da

Normal: No da.

Normal speech: "No da."

Thinking: No da

Yelling: "NO DA"

Whispering: 'no da'

Now to the story. no da

Hikaru was scared the sun was setting and he had no one to trun to for suport. His perents died in a horible

car acident and every one went to the funeral and every one told hime how sorry they were for his perents

death, but that every one didnt inculde one Akira Toya. Akira was the only person he really wanted to see at

the funeral. Now Hikaru walked down a street lit with dull red lights an his atire was one of those of some

one in deep depression, a black polo shirt, black pants, black eye liner around his eyes and lips and no smile.

After the funeral no one had seem or heard from him, he walked in to one of the clubs that lined thestreet and

ordered a drink and lit a cigerette.

Akira stood outsideof Hikaru's apartmentand pounded on the door. He had missed the funeral because one

of his his tutoring sessions went on longer then it should haveand now he was convinced that Hikaru was

avoiding him. he pounded on the door again. "HIKARU, ARE YOU HOME. IF YOU ARE OPEN THE DOOR!"

there was no answer. After a couple more minutes of pounding and yelling he decided to give up and he made

his way down to the lobby and out to the street where he seen Waya and Isumi. Normaly he wouldn't talk to

Waya but he was concerned for Hikari. "Oi Isumi-san do you know where Shindo is?" Akira asked.

"Sorry no. No one has seen him since the funeral we guessed that he wanted to be alone so we didnt bother to

call." Isumi said slightly surprised

" We did see him walking to the red light distrect though." Waya added. Before any thing else was said Akira

was off, running to the red light district in search for Hikaru.

Akira was out of breath when he got there it was not that often that he ran from one place to another or that he

had to run for that mater. The street as i mentioned before was lined with clubs and bars so it was hard to tell

which one Hikaru went to. Going on a wim he decided to first cheak the green dragon. Akira walked through the

door and was imediately blinded by the bright lights of the dance floor he took a look around and imidiately found

the one he was looking for. He ran up to the blonde-banged boy and spun him around in his seat. "HIKARU

SHINDO, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE?" Akira had o yell to make himself heard over the loud music.

"WHY DO YOU CARE. YOU DONT EVEN CARE THAT MY PERENTS ARE DEAD!" Hhikaru yelled back at him.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DONT CARE OF COURSE I .. " Akira was cut short by a slap in the face from Hikaru.

Akira lifted a hand to were he had been slapped and looked at Hikaru in surprise.

"YOU WHEREN'T AT THE FUNERAL. THE ONE PLACE I NEEDED YOU THE MOST AND NOW YOU COME

TO SEE ME AND SAY THAT YOU CARE NOW! A FUCKING WEEK AFTER THE FUCKING FACT THAT IT

HAPPENED. WHERE WERE YOU WHEN I WAS CRYING BECAUSE OF MY LOSE, WHERE WERE YOU

WHEN I DID THIS!" Hikaru lifted a band that covered his wrist to show where he had talken a raser and tried to

kill himself. "WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU!" trears were now streaming downthe sides of Hikaru's face as

he placed some money on the counter and ran out the door leaving a very shocked and confused Akira in the bar.

bum bum bum

A/N: Soooo what ya think this is only the beginning so dont fret. no da. It took some time for me to actualy right

this because i cept getting interuptted by my mom and brad and my brothe and supper and cooking and well

every thing. no da. the reason behind this story is because i am kinda depressed my self and the reason i chose

Hikaru to play this part is because i cant see akira do ing that kinda shit. no da. so please reveiw it is always nice

to hear from fans of hikaru no fo anf get flames from them. but please no flames thanks.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Hikaru no Go

A/N: So sorry that it took so long to update I have been busy lately so please don't kill me thanks. Please read and review.

Hikaru cried all the way home. His face was raw from wiping the tears away. _Why does he care now?_ Hikaru thought as he entered the apartment complex. He was sure no one he knew had seen him return home, so he could be alone and stay alone. He walked into the elevator and pressed the floor. He leaned back against the wall and slid to the floor as his mind went back to the day of the funeral.

FLASHBACK

Hikaru sat at the funeral as the sympathetic words from the people around him went in one ear and out the other. He stared at the door hoping that Akira Toya would walk in and talk to him with a concerned look on his normally passive face. Hikaru was totally oblivious to the fact that his friends Waya and Isumi had sat down beside him.

"Hey Hikaru wanna play a game, it will make you feel better." Waya said as he tried to get Hikaru to look at them.

Hikaru didn't even look at them even when Isumi placed a comforting hand on Hikaru's shoulder. _How would he know what would make me feel better? _Hikaru thought bitterly. He noticed vaguely that some one turned on some music. He know the song even though it was English and he was lulled in to a state depression.

I walk a lonely road  
The only one that I have ever known  
Don't know where it goes  
But it's home to me and I walk alone

I walk this empty street  
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams  
Where the city sleeps  
and I'm the only one and I walk alone

I walk alone  
I walk alone

_**I walk alone  
I walk a...**_

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me  
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating  
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me  
'Til then I walk alone

Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Aaah-ah,  
Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah

I'm walking down the line  
That divides me somewhere in my mind  
On the border line  
Of the edge and where I walk alone

Read between the lines  
What's fucked up and everything's alright  
Check my vital signs  
To know I'm still alive and I walk alone

I walk alone  
I walk alone

I walk alone  
I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me  
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating  
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me  
'Til then I walk alone

Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Aaah-ah  
Ah-ah, Ah-ah

I walk alone  
I walk a...

I walk this empty street  
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams  
Where the city sleeps  
And I'm the only one and I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me  
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating  
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me  
'Til then I walk alone...

He stood up and walked to the door. He went out in the parking lot of the funeral home and looked up at the sky. He could still hear the music wallowing out of the old building behind him. Damn the person how played that song at a funeral, but it told him how he felt and he told him self that it was true.

Waya and Isumi come rushing out. "Oi Hikaru come inside it is getting cold." Isumi said draping a coat over Hikaru's shoulders.

"Ya idiot don't what you catching a cold now do we." Waya laughed. Hikaru glared at him then ripped the coat from its position on his shoulders.

"YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT IS LIKE TO LOSE SOME ONE IMPORTANT TO YOU AND YET YOU WHAT ME TO PLAY GO! THEN YOU COME OUT HERE AND TRY AND TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK TO DO! WHAT IF I DON'T WHAT TO GO BACK IN TO THERE WITH PEOPLE HOW ONLY CARE IF I PLAY GO OR NOT." Hikaru yelled.

"H-hiker, calm down that is not true." Isumi said trying to get Hikaru to cool down.

"NO I WILL NOT LISTEN TO WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY I DON'T CARE" Hikaru screamed and ran off down the street.

END OF FLASHBACK

The elevator doors opened and he stepped out and went to his door and unlocked it and walked in he whet in to his bed and lay down if only he could have the person he loved and he fell in to a dreamless sleep.

$$ SCENE CHANGE $$

Akira sat at the bar and looked down at the drink that Hikaru had ordered before he left. _Damn it! Why did he flip like that? And why did he do that to himself? _Akira picked up the drink and took a sip. _Why was I so stupid I came here to talk to him see how he was doing. What did I do? _Akira he took another sip. _What was I suppose to do? Was I supposed to cry and say in sorry? Well I am for fuck sakes I don't know why I let him go. _Akira was getting frustrated with his stupidity of not being able to read ahead and downed the rest of the beer. He order one more and downed that and paid the bill and went to hunt down he fine and possibly drunk blonde-banged friend.

A/N: hi thank you for reading this crap of a chapter so please review and no flames please (hides behind her brother just in case) and Akira plushies to all that read this crap thank you. (Bows and walks away)


	3. im back now

A/N: Ha ha my crap flies ... I'm sorry I am just tired ok. I just realized that I haven not up dated this story in such a long time that I thought that I might as well try to continue it. So here is my up date, na no da.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the songs I may or may not put in this piece of crap and I surely don't own Hikaru no Go, na no da.

Chapter 3: Lets do this right the frist time ok. Na no da.

Akira walked down the street he had no clue as to were to go too find Hikaru but it didn't help that he was ever so slightly drunk, so on a whim he desided to see if the blonde was at his house but before he could say boo he noiced he was already there. Slightly weirded out that while his mind was on some thing else and yet his feet took him were ever they wanted but he quickly put that aside and made his way in to the apartment and up some stairs and he stopped at apartment numder C2. He knocked lightly and the door opened, 'Hikaru didnt close his door proporly' Akira thought as he walked in to Hikaru's home. He slowly and silently sloed the door and thenn head to the bed room and there he found the sleeping Hikaru. he nelt beside the bed and noticed that Hikaru didn't chand out of his cloths or cover up. he looed at the face of the sleeping boy and closd his eyes, tears were stinging his eyes. Hikaru stured on the bed andand slowly opened his eyes. Akira jumped to his feet 'Oh shit, this is not good!' he though as he looked down at Hikaru tears still in his eyes.

Hikaru opened his eyes fully and seen Akira. He sat up and glared "What are you doing in my home" he said coldly, as he looed at Akira. Akira looked down at his feet.

"I'm sorry but your door was open and I was worried about you." he stated quitely "I'll go. I'm sorry for intruding." and he turned to make his way to the door.

"Wait," Hikaru said getting up from the bed and walking over to Akira, "I'm sorry I shouldn't have been so crule before, I was just up set that you weren't at the funaral like you said you would."Hikaru said hugging Akira. Akira was slightly taken back at the action but accepeted it like it was the normalest thing in the world and hugged Hikaru back. Hikaru pulled away and lookedat the clock. "Well it looks like you missed the last train." Hikaru laughed as Akira franticly looked at the clock. "You know you can stay the night if you want." hikaru said as an after thought.

"Realy?" Akira said, Hikaru nodded "I dont want to be a bother."

"It's ok realy I havent had any one here in I don't know how long. It would be nice to have some compony" HIkaru said with a smile.

"Thank you so much." Akira said with a bow. "But I dont have any cloths to sleep in." akira stated sheepishly looking down at his feet.

Hikaru looked at him and went to the clost that was on the other side of the room and after fumbling arund in it he pulled out a set of light blue p.js. He grinned "Never thought I'd need to use these." he said also holding a pair of green ones in the other hand. "What color do ya want"he then asked.

"It's dark in here I cant tell." Akira stated going over to the light switch and turning on the lights then looking to see his choice. He thought for a moment "I' ll talke the blue." he said and then had them tosed in his face. He quicklyt re moved them ony to see Hikaru striping right there. "H-Hikaru what are you doing?" Akira said his voice unstedy and his face beet red.

"What?" Hikaru asked inocently "Havn't you ever changed in the boy's locker room?" he added, and Akira thought he herd Hikaru call him a prude. "Hope you don't mind that we have to share a bed, i never have any one over so there was no need for a futon." Hikaru looked up from under his hair to see that Akira was blushing maddly.

Akira shook his head and be gant to undress himself and changs in to the pajamas. they fit him pretty well. Akira noticed that hikaru still had his old go board and though it was now covered in a light layer of dust he could still see that hikaru had used it a lot. Hikaru seen him looking at the board and began to think about why he had qiut playing.

"Wanna play a game?" Akira asked pulling him out of his thoughts. he merly shook his head. Akira smiled and laughed. "Not a game of go baka, you got a deck of cards?" This nodded his ead and went out to the kitchen to get them out of the junk box. In the mean time Akira looked around the room, there were weekly go issues on the floor most of them had markers placed on various pages, a few pop cans on the foor and a list of hings to do. Akira picked up the list and raed it:

1. Go shopping for food

2. Pick up the new issuse of weekly go

3. Get a new set of go stones

4. Go and sell mom's old house

Akira was suprised that hikaru was going to sell his mom's house. hikaru walked in to the room and handed Akira the deck.

"So what are we going to play?" Hikaru asked sitting down on the floor in front of Akira and looked up.

"We're gonna play a game called strip poker." Akira said as he noticed a radio and went to turn it on. He then turned around to see a look os pure shock on Hikaru's face and instantly started to laugh.

"What! We're going to play 'strip' poker." Hikaru's look was screaming 'What the hell have you been smoking man 'cuase I want some.' Akira nodded and turned up the radio.

"I'm serious Hikaru, the person with the lowest hand has to remove an artical of clothing got it." Akira said in a very serious tone. Hikaru nodded 'oh my gawd' was the only thought that was going through hikaru's head as he stared at his rivel.

'Um, are you sure about this?" Hikaru said backing away slowly. Akira looked at hm and nodded. He them sat dwn on the floor and delt out the hands.

"Oh ya, hold on a sec." He ran to the door and locked it. "There now no one can desterb us." he returned to his seet and waited for hikaru to sit as well. "Well, aren't you gonna join me?" Akira asked. Hikaru took a seat on the floor across from him and looked at the light pink that was on the others cheeks. hikaru reached in to the pocket of his coat that was on the floor next to him and pulled out a pack of smokes and a lighter. Akira imediatly snached it from him and pulled one out and lit it and took in a drag.

'Oh my gawd!" Hikaru thought as Akira handed it back to him. "When did you start smoking Akira?" hikaru asked. Akira gave no answer and started to deal their hands. hikaru winced at his hand he got nothin. Akira had a huge smile on his face and it made him very nervous. Akira placed his hand down and well he had a two pair. Hikaru reluctantly placed his hand down to reveal a shitty hand. Akira grined and motioned for him to re move an artical of clothing, so he took off the black button up shirt he had on. After a half hour of lisyoning to the radio and playing poker hikaru was down to his boxers and Akira had only hid shirt and boxers on. Not to mention that he was still in a very good mood. 'I think he's drunk..." hikaru thought as he noticed again the pink on the normaly pale cheeks what was still there. Hikaru handed akira the cards he was holding so they could continue when he suddenly was pulled forward and landed on Akira. Hikaru tried to get up but Akira's arms went around his waist and held him there. He blushed and looked away from the green haired boy.

Akira looed at his captive and smerked. "Isn't this what you wanted?" Akira said. placing a kiss on the side of Hikaru's. Hikaru didn't know what to do.

Hikaru looked at Akira sure this was what he wanted but not he was like this. Akira was now crawling on him and kissing him. Hikaru had to close his eyes to restrain himself, when he felt Akira slip his hand in to his boxers he sta up imidiately forscing akira to get off of him.

Akira looked at him confused. "What's the matter Hikaru?" he asked his voise soft and husky.

A sad look crossed Hikaru's face. "Not like this." he said as he got up and puled the pajamas back on and looed at Akira as the other did the same. tears glisened in Akira's eyes as he did. Akira then walked over to Hikaru and leaned against him. placing his haed on his shoulder.

"I'm sorry Hikaru." he said with a soft tone. Hikaru smiled and looked at the green hair that was in his face. Suddenly Akira felt heavy. 'Oh shit.' Hikaru's mind was realing 'He fell asleep.' Hikaru carefully moved the boy to his bes and covered him with the blanket. An amusing thought poped in his haed st he looked at the man he loved. 'Oh the look on his face when i tell hm when he wakes up.' He then slipped under ther covers and fell asleep.

A/N: Few a new chapter done deticated to Totaly Out Of It for their incuragement I dont have spell cheak so if there is any thing wrong with the spelling dont kill me ok blame my computer. Oh and befor I forget the stuff Akira drank was not normal it was my speical beer that I made for this story. Hikaru was not drunk because he only had a little under half a glass. So ya hope you enjoy and please reveiw.


	4. what the hell

A/N: Hi ya people I hope to so far so here is the next chapter. I am a god... Not just kidding. Well I need to find some thing to do with my spare time so I have nothing to do. My perents are weird and dont care that I write this stuff so here I am writing yaoi. Weird? Yes. Out of the ordanary? Maybe. Am I gay? Who the hell knows. Ya well I dont think any one reads the outher note so to the story. Na no da.

Disclaimer: I dont own Hikaru no go if I did then well then Hikaru and Akira would be going at it like horny dogs. so please dont sue.

Warning: If you dont like the thought of gay people dont read this for it contains yaoi. Mmmmm yaoi.

Chapter 4

Akira was the frist to wake up, he didnt open his eyes, but shifted in bed and that was when he felt some one next to him. His eyes flew open imidiately and he looked to see Hikaru. 'What the hell!' he thought as he looed at the peaceful face. Hikaru stured for a moment and opened his eyes and smiled at Akira lovingly.

"Morning, you feeling any better." he asked. Akira looKed around nevoiusly around the room.

"W-what are you talking about?"

"Well you were drunk last night and you came over and well you missed your last bus so i offered for you to say here. Then you asked if I wanted to play a game, not of go but of strip poker. Beleave me that shocked the hell out of me. Well any ways you were winning and i was bown to my boxers..." Hikaru stopped to take a breath and he grinned. " you were down to the pajamas shirt that you are whereing now and your boxers. After that point things got weird because you climed over top of me and said some thing about me wanting that, then your hand decied to try and have fun in my pance. But i stoped you and then you fell asleep in my arms." he ended, ya he might have left out that he was dressed when he fell asleep, but he didnt care. Akira was red as a beet.

"Ohmigawd i did that." Akira turned his head. Hikaru smiled and moved closer to Akira. Akira was to busy with is thoughts to noitce the movement. he ramained still untill Hikaru placed a hand on his lap and he jumped to attention. "W-what!" his voice nevious and looked in to the eyes that were now driving in to his soul, or thats how it felt.

"Ya know, what you said was right. I really did what that but..." Hikaru looked down and started to fiddle with the blanket on Akira's lap. he took a deep breath "but i didnt what you to regret any thing and because... I-I love you." At that moment Hikaru looked right in to Akira's eyes his own filled with enough love to to knock the wind out of you. Akira couldn't help but to be drawn in to the love. He had always been confused about his feelings for the blond but this was the first time he relized what he really wanted.

"Hikaru, I'm still not to sure about this but," Akira said in a whisper "but I think I love you too." With that said he gently kissed Hikaru. Hikaru gently raped an arm around Akira's waist and pulled him down on top of him.

Akira didn't struglein sted he leened into him and reted his head in Hikaru's chest. The radio had been left on the intire night and a soft song came on, it was from one of the more popular animes and it made the room feel more confortable and both the boys liked the new atmesphere (sp) and didnt want to move.

Hikaru looed at his new companion and smiled. "Hikaru wanna come to the insatute with me?" Akira asked and plased a kiss on Hikaru's hand. Hikaru thought for awhile then nodded his head. Even thought he dreaded going he desided that he would rather go there with Akira then by himself.

Later that day Hikaru stood in front of the go instatute looking nevoisly at the front. Akira placed a hand on hes shoulder and looked at him with a smile then grabbed his hand and pulled him in to the building. the moved quickly in to one of the game rooms. Not many people were there and Waya and Isume were in the farther corner of the room. They both looked at the door as they herd it close and sseen Akira and Hikaru standing there.

Waya was the first to go over to them and was followed closely by Isume. "What the hell I thought you wern't coming back" he said said in disbeliefe. he looed at Akira and frowned.

"Well I thought the same." Hikaru stated looking down at the floor.

The rest of the day was spent catching up and chatting. Even thought Akira felt slightly out of place he just smiled and nodded in the apeopiate places. Hikaru told waya a lot of thing that happened and Arkia was happy that he left out last night and their little 'game'.

After a a short good bye Akira and Hikaru went back to Hikaru's apartment. HIkaru ploped down on on his couch and looked at Akira who was standig by the door. "What are you going too go home?" he asked looking at the other boy.

"Well I have invaded your space long enough now haven't I." Akira simply said has he made to open the door.

Hikaru jumped up and neerly pounced him and also almost knocking him to the ground. "You know you can stay longer I don't mind." Hikaru said placing a soft kiss on the other's lips. Akira was slightly taken back by the move but then started to kiss him back. when Hikaru pulled back Akira stood there and couldn't do any thing.

'What should I do?' akira thought wildly. Out of the blue he leened in to Hikaru and kissed him. It felt like the most natural thing in the world to him for some reason. He traced Hikaru's bottom lip begging for entrence. He could no long control himself he wanted more he wanted to taste the other boy so much. Hikaru slowly granted his request for enterance and Akria's toung slid in to his mouth and started a playful battle with his toung.

Hikaru mouned in to the other's mouth and slid one of his hands up Akira's shirt. Akira felt the calosed fingers glide over his now over heated skin and he started to remove his shirt, it was geting to hot for him. Hikaru was now geting to hot and took off his shirt as well. Soon enough both of there pance were becoming uncofutably tight and they moved to the bed. Hikaru and Akira fell o to the bed with Akira on the bottom. Akira mouned as he felt Hikaru's arousal brush agianst his. By now it was to late to stop for either of them. It was not like they wanted to stop.

Akira paused for a moment and looked up in to Hikaru's lovely brown eyes and said the one thing that was on his mind at that moment. "I love you Shindo, you dont know how much I love you." Hikaru was slightly taken back by this but at least he now know how the other felt.

Hikaru striped Akira of the last of his clothes and started to ravish his body with all his passion. Akira mouned and leaned up in to the tuoch. Hikaru snaked an arm befind Akira and...

$to be continued$

Kurai-chan: Wow! Now that took longer then i first thought but nice any ways. Well I got time so here is the resipe for a yaoi story.

1cup of suspence

1/2 cups of love

pinch of fluff

1/2 cups of pain

1 handful of sweet candy

mix well then add

5 cups of smut/sex or what ever you call it

Kurai-chan:Bwahahahah the perfect resiply for a yaoi story. I am a master cheff.

Demon Lord Kyuubi: Hits Kurai-chan You are not a master cheff and it is not perfect.

Kurai-chan: What do you mean? It is perfect I made it. you just wanna be mean bro. well i hope you enjoyed this chapter.

Demon Lord Kyuub: If you like this crap stay tuned.


	5. WAYA AND ISUME SQUEEEE

A?N: Ok I am finally updating this shit. Hope I can get back on it.

Chapter 5

It was later that evening after they finished their "fun" and both were tired Hikaru picked up the blanket and was about to pulled it over him and his new lover when there was a knock at the door his mind was in too out of it to think straight so he went to the door and opened, there stood Waya and Isume.

"What are you two doing here?" Hikaru said as he grabbed some thing to cover up with, that thing being Akira's shirt. The two boys in the doorway blushed lightly at the naked boy.

"W-well, we were just coming by to see how you were doing, but I guess we caught you at a bad ti…" just before Isume could finish his sentence herd Akira's voice called from the bed room. "We'll be going now." He grabbed Waya and walked to the elevator and got in.

"What the hell was that for? It was your idea to come now we're leaving and what the he…" Waya was quickly silenced with Isume's lips on his own and he was pushed back to the elevator wall. "What was that for!" gasped as he pulled away. Isume smiled slyly and pressed the emergency stop button on the elevator.

"I just thought since those two are busy we could have our own fun" Isume said as he stepped over to Waya and raped his arms around the smaller boy.

"Couldn't this wait till we got home?" Isume shook his head.

"Not after seeing that little tidbit it was… well it was Akira and Hikaru in bed together." Isume laughed "I wonder when that happened?" He leaned down and started to place soft kisses down Waya's jaw and down his neck. He slid a hand under the younger boy's shirt and searched out a pert nipple pinching and teasing it between his fingers, earning him gasps and moans form his lover.

"Ah! Isume." Waya moaned as he felt his pants being unzipped. His hard member pressed unbearably against its cloth confines. Isume slowly slid his hand down the front of the underwear beneath the denim and rubbed the boy slowly. He used is other hand to remove the boy's shirt as Waya struggled to remove his.

"Waya, I didn't know you were so sensitive." Isume said he went down on to his knees and pulled Waya's pants with him. He kissed the tip of the hard organ in front of him gaining him a moan from the boy above.

"Isume please, I want you." Waya pleaded looking down at him with tears in his eyes. Isume smiled and took in the boy's length. Waya hands tangled in his hair while moaning encouraging him to do more. Waya tensed as he felt a finger prodding his entrance soon the pain of two fingers entering his engulfed his system. Soon the pain turned to pleasure as Isume continued to suck him. "Isume!" he let out as he came in to the older boy's mouth.

Isume removed hid fingers and prepared himself to enter his young lover "are you ready?" he asked. Waya nodded and readied himself for the pain that was sure to come. Isume trusted in to Waya imbedding himself all the way in, slowly he started to trust in and out once he herd Waya's moans he picked up his pace trusting harder and deeper in to the small boy. He then grabbed the boy's erection and started for the second orgasm moving in time with his own thrusts.

"Isume I'm gonna come" Waya screamed as he came his muscles clamping down on Isume casing him to go over the edge.

A/N: Bwahahahhahahahahahaha I finished the chapter

Neko: after how long ?

Me: shut up. Well I hope you like and review even if it sucks..

Neko: flames will be used to cook my marshmallows just so you know.

Me : yup nods also note this is my first official lemon so please any pointers would be nice


	6. Dont kill me Neko i updated

Kurai-chan: Thanks to all who reviewed it was great to here from you and so for all your time I will give you a plushy.

Neko: Yesh thank you.

Kurai-chan: I know it had been a long time since I have updated but I have been busy with school.

Neko: Ya she has even neglected me. (Cry)

Kurai-chan: I'm sorry so here you go the next chapter.

Disclaimer: I don't own Hikaru no go so don't sue me.

-- A FEW DAYS AFTER THE LAST CHPTER ENDED --

The next few days went by quickly for Hikaru. He had a few games to go to and he was busy with the press so he had little time to spend with Akira. Every time he did see Akira he was swept away by one of the other pros. It was starting to get on his nerves he wanted to be with his lover. But no matter were he was there was always some sort of distraction. He disliked the attention her was getting and needed to escape.

Akira had fewer problems except for the fact that he thought that Hikaru was ignoring him. He didn't know that the younger pro had such a busy schedule and was being pulled off to the side for games that he had no intention in playing and was in fact trying to see him. So this caused Akira nonstop worry. It got to the point that he was actually wanting to just pull him away from every body, in fact that was just what he was going to do. So he set off to find his lover.

Waya and Isume were in the middle of a game when Hikaru barged in to the room. "hide me now!" he said as he tried to catch his breath. "Thought fucking people wont leave me alone. I can't even find time to take a piss!" he sighed and sat down next to Waya. Waya snickered, it had been awhile since the three were together and it amused him that Hikaru was there to hide.

Akira was walking down the hall when he heard Hikaru's voice from behind the door. He stopped for a moment as he listened. He only caught Waya's snicker and Isume's sigh, so he opened the door, only to see Hikaru go and hide. He then slammed the door shut and ran off down the hall. He was hurt by Hikaru's reaction.

Hikaru duck to hide as he heard the door being opened thinking it was reporters again and looked up as he heard the door slam shut again. He blinked in confusion and looked at Waya and Isume. Waya was trying to suppress a laugh and Isume looked concerned. "What?" he asked innocently not knowing what he just did. Isume merely shook his head and waya couldn't control himself any longer and he started to laugh wildly and told him what just happened with Akira. Hikaru went white and ran out the door, thinking he might be able to catch him.

BEWARE THE ZOMBIES

Akira was already on at the elevator when he seen Hikaru coming around the corner. The elevator then opened, he quickly got in and pressed the 'Close Door' button and the door closed slowly.

Hikaru got to the elevator just as the door closed. 'Shit' he thought and ran to the stairs and started to descend the stairs two at a time. He got to the main level just in time to see Akira got out of the front doors of the building. So he ran to catch him before he got to the subway.

Kurai-chan: Hmmm should we cut it off here?

Neko: I don't think so they might kill you.

Kurai-chan: You know you might be right but I don't want to write any more!

Neko: (pulls out a gun and points it at kurai-chan's head) you will continue this chapter.

Kurai-chan: Meep!!! Ok ok can have a smoke brake first?

Neko: ok you may but I'm watching you.

(15 minutes later)

Kurai-chan: I'm back… now back to the story.

Hikaru got to the subway station just in time to get on the same one as Akira. He pushed his way throw the crowd to get to Akira to find the older boy's head down and his breathing ruff and his body shaking. "Akira. I-" he tried to say but he got a deadly glare from the boy he was speaking to.

"You what don't want to see me. If that is so then you don't you just tell me instead of hiding?!" Akira growled out in a low voice tear were starting to form in his eyes.

"Its not what you think. I thought…" Hikaru started but was interrupted again.

"You thought what? That I just said that I loved you for the sake of saying it?" he looked up and the tears began to fall, he looked away again he didn't want Hikaru, or any one else, to see him like this.

The conversation was starting to gain some attention from the other passengers and it was not something that should be shared so Hikaru grabbed Akira's wrist and dragged him to the next car which was near empty. "Look Akira that's not what I ment at all. I just thought you were some one who wanted a game with me or some news reporter. I didn't mean to hurt you in any way. I'm sorry if I hurt you though." Akira looked at him, his eyes wide and tears flowing.

Hikaru was still holding his wrist and pulled him in to a hug "I'm sorry as well I guess I just …" it was his turn to be cut off as Hikaru covered his lips with his own. The kiss was soft and caring, then he felt Hikaru's tongue trace his lips and he opened them allowing the kiss to deepen. He rapped his arms around Hikaru's neck pulling him closer.

Once they parted their lips were swollen. They looked at each other and Hikaru looked away blushing. "Want to come to my place ?" Hikaru asked softly in to Akira's ear. Akira nodded and they got off at the next stop to catch the one that would take them to Hikaru's apartment.

BEWARE THE MORMEN

Back at the Go institute Waya was still laughing as Isume gave him a smack across the head to make him stop. "So do you think those two will work it out?" Waya asked as he caught his breath from laughing so much.

"I hope so or things will be coward." Isume replied looking out the window. Waya looked at him and a grin formed on his face. Isume looked at him. "And just what are you thinking?" he asked the young man.

"Well we are alone." Waya said as he walked to the door and looked it. Isume looked at him and smiled.

"I see." he walked over to the young man and rapped his arms around him and they kissed

To be continued …

Kurai-chan: Wow that took for ever man!

Neko: No it didn't your just lazy. (still holding the gun to her head)

Kurai-chan: Well fine then be like that (pout)

Neko: Well we hope you like it and please review and I will get this one to update the other ones soon (smiles at her and pats the gun)

Kurai-chan: Meep! Yes I shall update soon kk home you like.

Both: **HAVE FUN!!!!!**


	7. note to the reader

To: The Readers

I am sorry for the inconvenience but the story is currently being re-written so that any one reading wont kill me for the misspelling of words and getting every one confused with what I am trying to say. It may take me some time but be assured that it will be all over soon … I think …

And on another note my name will be changing some time in the future but I have no clue to what yet. Suggestions are appreciated.

Thank you

Kurai Tsunkuyomaru


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